Full of symbolic meaning, this is carried out during the
marriage ceremony in church.
First, mothers of the bridegroom and bride are given a
lighted candle each. The bridegroom’s mother lights the candle held by the
bridegroom. Similarly, the bride’s mother lights the candle held by the bride.
The mothers now extinguish their own candles.
Next, both the bridegroom and bride use their lighted
candles to light a centrally placed, much
larger candle.
What is the significance behind this act?
Firstly, the fact that the parents (in
this case, the mothers represent the parents) light the candles for their
children speaks of “leaving and
cleaving”.
“That is why a man leaves
his father and mother and is united to
his wife, and they become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24).
By blowing off their candles
after lighting the candles for their children, the mothers implicitly give
their blessing for their children to start a new family of their own – without any interference from the families
of their origin.
The mothers tell them: “We
are letting you go to start a new life of your own.”
If such biblical wisdom of “leaving
and cleaving” is heeded, then we would not have to face so many problems created
by mothers-in-law, which threaten to cause friction and disharmony in the newly
created family.
Secondly, the couple no longer see themselves as
individuals living out their lives independently but as life partners who are to be “subject to one another out of
reverence for Christ” (Ephesians 5:21).
They have to consider the
needs, desires, goals and aspirations of the other party, besides that of their
own. *
Marriage is not a 50-50 proposition.
Each partner gives his or her all. Stop keeping count: Why I give so much and you give so little?
* Instructions for Christian Households:
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do
to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the
wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the
Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit
to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as
Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.
(Ephesians 5:21-25).
Some Tips for a Happy Marriage:
Marriage should be a
duet - when one sings the other claps. - Joe Murray
Marriage resembles a
pair of shears so joined that they cannot be separated. Often moving in
opposite directions yet always punishing anyone who comes between them. -
Sidney Smith
An
archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have. The older she gets, the
more he is interested in her! - Agatha Christie
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Happily Ever After:
Splendour of Love:
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